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Even if the Curtains die to a Lightning Bolt or Unholy Heat (rarely with delirium on Turn 2) after blocking the Monkey, they still blocked the Monkey before trading, when the typical auto-loss pattern is having your Turn 1 creature die to removal on the spot while your opponent gets a free Treasure and card flip
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It can attack and no matter when it came under your control.) Equip (: Attach to target creature you control
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I wanted something extra to make the card exciting (artifact synergies) and decided it should go to hand instead of battlefield (because the text was shorter and the card is already cluttered enough)