Have some self respect
I love The Reaper, King No More, because it turns a blighted creature from a foe to a friend once per turn, and can deter board wipes if you spread the -1/-1 counters around enough
I have to admit that releasing this land as the Green Dragon Inn also feels very flavorful and appropriate
Self-Destruct Rating: 2/10 Im sure you can engineer some scenario with an indestructible creature or something with a lot of toughness, but for the most part this is just Fling
Thatd have been hilarious on its own, but, best of all is how he also comes equipped with fading 3, which means that his old life will inevitably end after three turns
Right from the beginning of the game, Magic has had a subtype of enchantments which could actually be attached to a creature, providing some ongoing effect to said creature